Mothers - Inspired Living SA

Children, Family, Mothers, Parenting, Parenting Advice

Just Call Me Mom

I have always had a strong belief in self -preservation but who am I kidding! Once you have stepped over to the “other side”, what the professionals like to call motherhood, life as you knew it is over.

Apart from the ever increasing waist line, stretch marks and the savage reality of wrinkles or “fine- lines”, as the media calls it, when can you remember the last occasion you actually managed to complete a train of thought, never mind a conversation with another adult? I have vague memories of actually sitting down to eat lunch, which consisted of more than a just a handful of nuts and biltong sticks, on the run. Your brain is just not tuned the way it used to be. I remember reading about a condition known as ‘porridge-brain’, experienced during pregnancy; what they failed to mention is that this condition is permanent. I guess a great deal of these things can be attributed to age but I am not convinced.

The rather sad realisation is that up until a few months ago I was still convinced that someday, I would be able to fit into my pre-pregnancy clothing. Maybe it’s the fact that I am approaching 40, with what seems to be the speed of a bullet train, but my perspective on life has changed somewhat. The thought of aging or the fact that I will probably never again fit into those size 30 jeans, is no longer of extreme importance to me.

So the reality that I am faced with is that my life is definitely on a different course. The things I previously wanted have morphed into a deep-seated desire to see my children happy and successful. Yes, I guess, I have gained a completely selfless outlook. OK, in all honesty not completely selfless but I am working on it.

The big question is, am I happy with this new reformed version of me? The young vivacious 20 year old, inside is screaming “hell no” but the mother of two knows better. Like an animal in the wild I have adapted to my surroundings. It certainly does not mean that I have lost sight of my dreams and desires but I have had to alter the vision for my life to include that of my family. Although I would still love to be carefree and self-indulgent, I have a family and they depend on me. I need to be wife and a mother first and hopefully the rest will fall into place.

So just call me Mom!

Family, Mothers

What Kind of a Mom Are You?

The Homemaker: You are always encouraging and caring. You all most never put yourself first and strive to be the perfect homemaker. You go out of your way to make others feel good. You are a domestic goddess and your home always smells like freshly baked goodies.

Your attributes: You succeed in making your children feel loved and cared for. You are fun and engaging and your children thrive on this. You are self-sacrificing. Your home is always warm and inviting.

The New Age Mom: You are trendy and hip. All your children’s friends love being around you. You are more of a friend or sister to your children than a mother figure.

Your attributes: You make your children feel loved and accepted for who they are. Your children can confide in you with ease. You are “Sex in the City” meets “Desperate Housewives”.

The Liberated Mom: You like to have your own space and you encourage your children to have theirs. You promote independence in your family and you urge your children to experience life. You certainly do not do packed lunches and your children pack their own school bags.

Your attributes: You allow your children the freedom to make their own decisions and in turn learn from their mistakes. Your children are independent and self- sufficient. You make time for yourself and your own interests.

The Structured Mom: Your home runs with military precision; you thrive on routine and structure. Everything you do is with purpose and the end goal in mind. You manage to juggle your routine and your families with complete ease.

Your attributes: Nothing ever fazes you; you seem to have a solution to any problem. Your home is always pristine and you never leave the house without make up. You are competitive and expect a great deal from your children.

The ‘Good enough’ Mom: What I like to call ‘The Hybrid’, you are little bit of each of these personalities. Although you would love to be the perfect Mom, there are just not enough hours in the day to do it all.

Your attributes: You are who you are and if that’s not good enough, then too bad. You get it right most of the time and you do what you have to, to maintain your sanity. Who needs perfection anyway!

Family, Mothers, Quotes

Mothers Day

What it means to be a Mother/ Mom
Upon deciding to write a Mother’s Day blog I thought it would be fun to ask my friends and family to give me their description or definition of a mother. Thank you to those of you who contributed. Here is what they had to say:

From Elaine Smith
“God created Mothers to remind every generation of their valuable input ….. A good mother provides her children so much more than a happy home. She teaches them how to feed their souls and gives them a spiritual foundation on which to build their life. She cares about how her child will face the world. A mother is hardheaded about discipline and soft-hearted about everything else. She motivates her children and praises them constantly to help them reach their full potential. She epitomizes strength, dignity and wisdom.”

From Kirsten Rossiter

“Nurturer, the most powerful Christ-like figure to our children… living out His Love, His Presence, His Kindness, His Goodness, His Patience… His Character. ‘ Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.’ Prov 22:6. The language of our actions will train them more than the language of our tongue. “

From Lisa Mouton

“For me mother = unconditional love”

From Amanda Wiemers

“On good days I think being a mum means “a privilege” and an undeserved one. On bad days I think it’s a privilege too, but with a great dollop of patience you never knew you had thrown in too.”

From Ian Rossiter

“For me a mother represents love wisdom, safety and strength. Mom has always been there to give advice and comfort. She has spent many an hour praying for each of us. God’s hands of blessing and protection have been on all of our lives because she forged the way first.”

From Shelley Nell

“Being a mother for me is the following:
– simply the best and worst job in the world
– teaching your child and then days, weeks and sometimes years later seeing that teaching manifesting itself in the most amazing ways
– testing your worst character traits (for me it is a lack of patience) every single day
– letting your child go is the hardest – whether it is something as small as a play date on their own, letting them climb that tall tree to letting them go to a rugby match on their own or away for a holiday without you.
– Nothing else on earth can bring you such immeasurable joy as seeing your child succeed at something they are good at.
– being a mom allows you to celebrate the small victories in life – learning to walk, ride a bike, swim a length underwater etc.
– it also allows me to be ‘silly’ with my boys and enjoy things like rollercoaster rides, building sandcastles etc. without people looking at you funny.
– it is also looking at things which you thought were so funny or cool as a child/ teenager and realising they were bloody annoying for the adults concerned.
– realising how much your parents sacrificed for you”

From Grant Rossiter

“Unconditional love, self-sacrifice and always there to help pick up the pieces. The go-to person when things just don’t seem to make sense and you just need to talk it through. Thanks mom for all the endless hours of listening and input into our lives.”

For me being a Mother has truly been the most amazing, yet challenging experience I have had in my life. It has made me grow mentally and spiritually in ways I never knew possible. I have realised that motherhood is not what I expected or predicted and that I would be willing to give up the world for the love and happiness of my children.

Today I would like to thank all those Mothers or Mother Figures all over the world that are so important to us. They are the basis of society and responsible for so much growth and inspiration the world over. So if we do not say it enough every day, we love you and appreciate all you are and do.

I have written this poem in celebration of motherhood and I dedicate it to my Mom who is no longer with us…

Just One Wish – by Fiona Rossiter

If I had just one wish

What would it be?

Would I wish for riches?

Something I could see.

If I had just one wish

What will I do?

Use it on something just for me.

If I had just one wish

It would be for one more day spent just with you

To tell you all the things I never did

To laugh and cry

To feel your breath upon my face

To see the pride in your eyes

To thank you for being my mom

If I had just one wish

It would be for my girls to meet you

For them to see just how special a mother can be

To know the gran they never met

To ask you all the questions they now ask me

If I had just one wish

It would be for you to know

Just how special you are to me

To say I miss you and love you so much

I would thank you for always being there for me…..

For being all a Mother could ever be.

Quotes:

“I remember my mother’s prayers and they have always followed me. They have clung to me all my life.” ~Abraham Lincoln

“Mother’s love is peace. It need not be acquired, it need not be deserved.” ~Erich Fromm

“God could not be everywhere, so he created mothers.” ~Jewish Proverb

Wishing all moms a wonderful Mothers Day!

Be Inspired, Family, Love, Mothers, Poems

A Mother's Love

By Michael O. Adesanya

There are times only when a Mother’s love

Can understand our tears,

Can soothe our disappointments

And calm all our fears. There are times when only a Mother’s Love

Can share the joy we feel

When something we’ve dreamed about

Quite suddenly is real. There are times when only a Mother’s faith

Can help on life’s way

And inspire in us the confidence

We need from day to day.

For a Mother’s heart and a Mother’s faith

And a Mother’s steadfast love

Were fashioned by the Angels

And sent from God above…